Things you'll never hear your father say:

10. Well how 'bout that?... I'm lost! Looks like we'll have to stop
and ask for directions.

9. You know Pumpkin, now that you're thirteen, you'll be ready for
non-chaperoned car dates. Won't that be fun?

8. I noticed that all your friends have a certain "up yours"
attitude.... I like that in a young person!

7. Here's a credit card and the keys to my new car. GO CRAZY!!!

6. What do you mean you want to play football? Figure skating not
good enough for you, son?

5. Your mother and I are going away for while. You might want to
consider throwing a party.

4. Well, I don't know what's wrong with your car. Probably one of
those doo-hickie thingies - you know - that makes it run or something.
Just have it towed to the mechanic's and pay whatever they ask.

3. No son of mine is going to live under this roof without an
earring - now quit your belly aching and lets get to the mall.

2. Whaddaya want to go and get a job for? I make plenty of money
for you to spend.

1. Father's Day? Ah - don't worry about that - it's no big deal.