Politically correct terms for females

She does not:  GET PMS
  She becomes:  HORMONALLY HOMICIDAL

  She does not have:  A KILLER BODY
  She is:  TERMINALLY ATTRACTIVE

  She is not:  A BAD COOK
  She is:  MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE

  She is not:  A BAD DRIVER
  She is:  AUTOMOTIVELY CHALLENGED

  She is not:  A PERFECT 10
  She is:  NUMERICALLY SUPERIOR

  She is not:  EASY
  She is:  HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE

  She does not:  HATE SPORTS ON TV
  She is:  ATHLETICALLY BIASED

  She does not have:  SEXY LIPS
  She is:  COLLAGEN DEPENDENT

  She does not get:  DRUNK
  She is:  ACCIDENTALLY OVER SERVED

  You do not ask her:  TO DANCE
  You request:  A PRECOITAL RHYTHMIC EXPERIENCE

  She is not:  A GOSSIP
  She is a:  VERBAL TERMINATOR

  She does not:  WORK OUT TOO MUCH
  She is an:  ABDOMINAL OVERACHIEVER

  She does not have a:  GREAT BUTT
  She is:  GLUTEUS TO THE MAXIMUS

  She is not:  HOOKED ON SOAP OPERAS
  She is:  MELODRAMATICALLY FIXATED

  She is not:  COLD OR FRIGID
  She is:  THERMALLY INCOMPATIBLE

  She does not:  WEAR TOO MUCH MAKEUP
  She is:  COSMETICALLY OVERSATURATED

  She does not have:  GREAT CLEAVAGE (A GREAT RACK)
  Her breasts are:  CENTRALLY LOCATED

  She will never:  GAIN WEIGHT
  She will become:  A METABOLIC UNDERACHIEVER

  She is not:  A SCREAMER OR MOANER
  She is:  VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE

  She does not:  SHAVE HER LEGS
  She experiences:  TEMPORARY STUBBLE REDUCTION

  She does not have:  A HARD BODY
  She is:  ANATOMICALLY INFLEXIBLE

  She does not:  SUN BATHE
  She experiences:  SOLAR ENHANCEMENT

  Her breasts will never:  SAG
  They will:  LOSE THEIR VERTICAL HOLD

  She does not:  SHOP TOO MUCH
  She is:  OVERLY SUCEPTIBLE TO MARKETING PLOYS

  She does not:  CUT YOU OFF
  She becomes:  HORIZONTALLY INACCESSIBLE

  She does not have:  BIG HAIR
  She is:  OVERLY AEROSOLED

  She does not:  SNORE
  She is:  NASALLY REPETITIVE

  She does not:  GET DRUNK
  She becomes:  VERBALLY DYSLEXIC

  She does not have:  BIG HOOTERS
  Her:  CUPS RUNNETH OVER

  She is not:  TOO SKINNY
  She is:  SKELETALLY PROMINENT