Toddler Property Laws

1.  If I like it, it's mine.

2.  If it's in my hand, it's mine.

3.  If I can take it from you, it's mine.

4.  If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.

5.  If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.

6.  If I'm doing or building something, all the pieces are mine.

7.  If it looks just like mine, it's mine.

8.  If I think it's mine, it's mine.

9.  If I . . . Oops! I goofed, I'm sorry! Instead of typing in the Toddler
Property Laws, I've been typing in Bill Gates' Primary Business Plan.

Veteran Pillsbury Spokesman, Pop'n Fresh died yesterday of a severe yeast
infection.  He was 71.

Fresh was buried in one of the largest funeral ceremonies in recent years.
Dozens of celebrities turned out including, Mrs. Butterworth, the California
Raisins, Hungry Jack, Betty Crocker, and Sara Lee.

The gravesite was covered with many flours as longtime friend, Aunt Jemima,
gave the eulogy, describing Fresh as 'a man who never knew how much he was
kneaded.'

Fresh rose quickly in show business but his later life was filled with
turnovers.  He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his
dough on half-baked ideas.  Still, even as a crusty old man, he was a roll
model for millions.

Fresh is survived by his wife and their two children, and one in the oven.

The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.