News From The Vatican . . .

The Pope met with his cardinals to discuss a proposal from Benjamin
Netanyahu, the leader of Israel. "Your Holiness," said one of the
Cardinals, "Mr. Netanyahu wants to challenge you to a game of golf to
show
the friendship and ecumenical spirit shared by the Jewish and Catholic
faiths."

The Pope thought it was a good idea, but he had never held a golf club
in
his hand. "Have we not," he asked "anyone at all who can represent me
against the leader of Israel?"

"None that plays golf very well," a cardinal said. "But, he added,
"there
is a man named Jack Nicklaus, an American golfer who is a devout
Catholic.
We can offer to make him a cardinal; then ask him to play Benjamin
Netanyahu as your personal representative. In addition to showing our
spirit of cooperation, we'll also win the match."

Everyone agreed it was a good idea. The call was made. Of course,
Nicklaus
was honored and agreed to play. The day after the match, Nicklaus
reported
to the Vatican to inform the Pope of the result. "I have some good news
and
some bad news, Your Holiness," said the golfer.

"Tell me the good news first, Cardinal Nicklaus," said the Pope.

"Well, your Holiness, I don't like to brag, but even though I've played
some pretty terrific rounds of golf in my life, this was the best I have
ever played, by far. I must have been inspired from above. My drives
were
long and true, my irons were accurate and purposeful and my putting was
perfect. With all due respect, my play was truly miraculous."

"There's bad news?" the Pope asked.

Nicklaus sighed. "I lost to Rabbi Tiger Woods by three strokes."